Monthly Archives: February 2014

Churchwell to Tamerlane

So I just finished watching Homeless to Harvard: The Liz Murray Story. It’s the true story of a girl about my age in NYC who grew up with drug-addicted parents and who subsequently left home at age fifteen. When her mother died, she began attending school, finished at the top of her class in only 2yrs and then earned a scholarship to attend Harvard.

As inspirational as this story is, it’s merely a glaring example showing me that, while I had a pretty shitty childhood, apparently it just wasn’t quite shitty enough to motivate me to do better.

In fact, instead of pushing myself to succeed despite the lack of support from my family, I only shrank back in fear. I always believed myself to be capable of greatness- just never trusted that anyone else ever would believe in me as well. So why try?

What if it really was all in my head? What if my so-called potential only existed in my mind? If I attempted to reach the impossible dreams I’d always envisioned for myself & that turned out to be true, I’d not only be a failure- I’d be a failure without a dream.

And so I never tried because it just seemed to me that, until I had that one person in my life who believed in me even when I couldn’t, nothing I attempted to achieve would be a success. And it’s true: nothing that I have attempted on my own since he found me has succeeded!!!

I have failed– and failed miserably– at everything 😦

An original work by *crptnite*

All content is to be considered fictional and any likeness to any persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental- all truths are said in jest 😉

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